Had another interesting weekend. We’d planned to meet up with the volunteers in Arusha, as well as getting Franatee to a dentist out there. Saturday morning, we jumped on a bus (after walking quickly past a guy smoking a cigarette on top of a petrol tanker...shudder) and were soon in Arusha hip deep in other Kiwis. We all went to the Blue Heron, an upmarket outdoor restaurant and caught up over beers, Bacardi (me) and lunch. By a happy coincidence, a play (in English) was being put on that night at the Arusha Hotel by the ‘Dar Es Salaam Players’ and we had tickets booked. Kudos to the organiser!
It was hours until the play so we decided to get some afternoon exercise. A mini-putt course was fabled to exist in Arusha and we were determined to find it. After a bit of wandering we found it, a 9 hole course at the ‘Le Jacaranda’ hotel. A waiter brought us refreshments (more beer) as we played.
Worst. Course. Ever.
I can only conjecture that the holes were designed by someone with very limited actual mini-putt hours logged. Crazy sheer angles, no room for error (or even a golf ball on some of the slopes) and balls constantly flying out of bounds. But all good fun. The wife beat me by 1 stroke, did a trick shot off a roof and found a tame rabbit to play with, so she was happy.
Are you ‘aving a laff?
After some sushi, it was time for the play. We rolled to the Arusha Hotel, finding it packed with smartly dressed ex-pats...also there for the play I assumed. I felt a little underdressed. Wandering in the hotel, I passed through the ‘Safari Casino Room’ and got flashbacks to my time working in gambling operational policy. Another beer helped calm me down.
Showtime!
As we took our seats amidst the pre-show music playing, I suddenly heard OMC’s ‘How Bizarre’. I went a little crazy hearing that NZ anthem in Africa and started whooping for joy. (did I mention we had been drinking since noon?) Got some right filthy looks we did.
The play was awesome: ‘Bouncers’ an adult drama/comedy dealing with the trials and tribulations of the bouncing scene in Northern England. I think some of the English humour was lost on some of the ex-pat audience, but the Kiwis were laughing uproariously (you can take a man out of the Hutt but...). At one point I brayed with laughter at one crass line, only to realise no one else was laughing (cue second round of filthy looks).
A great show. Any play with ‘Tubthumpin’ by Chumbawumba in the soundtrack is the best play ever.
After a post play drink and debrief, we moved on to ‘Via Via’ a local night club and sat outside with (yes)some more drinks. A couple of MJ songs enticed the wife and I in for a dance. A local Tanzanian who was the friend of one of us turned up and joined us outside.
All aboard...the night train!
Okay.
I dunno which intrepid one amongst first mooted the idea but I have my suspicions. Anyway, it was getting past midnight and one of us suggested that it would be an awesome idea to get in a car and just drive until we found some coast to watch the sunrise. What can I say, alcohol is conducive to enthusiasm. We did however discount the possibility of a late night run across the Kenyan border to the coast of Mombasa.
We discussed the idea of being taxied a relatively short distance outside of the Arusha town limits and waiting in a ‘paddock’ ie on the plains until dawn. I and 3 other kiwis were in. Our Tanzanian friend’s face alternated between bemusement and horror, but he too agreed to come.
My wife (sensibly) decided to sit this one out and get some sleep at a volunteer’s house. She told me she didn’t want to see me get mugged again. I didn’t tell her that it was probably snakes that would be the concern in the wild, rather than muggers.
We rolled back to a house and grabbed blankets and jackets. I had some residual misgivings about the wisdom of this enterprise but the others were really keen and I felt that it was incumbent on me as a mature role model to not deprive the group of the benefit of my sensible, guiding hand. So grabbing a bread knife for protection, I headed out the door.
Our posse contracted an incredulous taxi driver at 1am to drive us out of Arusha to somewhere away from lights where we could see the stars. A short while later we were crashing through a maize field in the dead of the night, moving away from the lights shining from the Arusha airport in the distance. Aside from the distant airport and a couple of lights twinkling from some houses far off it was dark and still.
And cold. I really wish I had had more than just a t-shirt on. While some of our group snored contentedly under jackets, I couldn’t settle on the rocky ground. Plus, I think it was sinking in for our Tanzanian friend that we really did want to stay there until dawn and he was getting a little grouchy and vocal about that.
The sky was a bit cloudy at first, but it soon cleared and we could see stars overhead. The odd bat and owl whirled around overhead. I assume it was an owl, otherwise that was one big freakin’ brown bat that buzzed me. Too cold and wired to sleep, I wandered off from the group for a comfort stop. I did not realise that it is actually hard to find a misplaced group of huddled, sleeping forms again in a maize field. I wandered up and down for about half an hour. Ran into the grouchy Tanzanian who had gotten lost like me. We wandered a bit more calling out ‘Dudes! Dudes!’ before we stumbled across the Kiwis again. I later found out that one of them had heard me calling but thought I was a bandit or something so kept quiet. Dead to me.
Lay there for a while. It was now about 430am and it was still freaking cold. I was shivering like anything. I finally snapped and started huddling in with the unisex sleepers, desperate for body warmth. Don’t tell mke. The guy spooning behind me actually did stop the shivers, even if it was all becoming a little bit like this Heath Ledger movie I once saw:
I didn’t really get to sleep at all; the Tanzanian was still awake and loudly vocalising his views of the wisdom of New Zealanders..finally about 545am Sunday morning it started getting lighter. Around 630am, the horizon went a nice pink/golden colour and directly ahead we had nice silhouette of Mount Meru. I dunno if it was all ‘worth it’ but it was a nice Kodak moment.
(this guy looks less than happy about his night's accommodation)
Then as luck would have it, local workers turned up to work in the maize fields. Awkward. I really don’t know what they made of this gaggle of scruffy wazungu crashed out in the middle of the field, but they smiled as we started trudging for home (stopping briefly to remove a huge furry caterpillar from my back that, apparently, is very poisonous).
We grabbed a dala dala back to Arusha, looking exhausted and clutching our blankets. A quick stop for chai in a local place. The Masaai in there smirked good naturedly at our motley group. I reunited with the wife, bailed on the idea of a dentist for now, said our goodbyes to those krazy kiwis and took the insanely speeding bus home to Moshi.
I was shattered all Sunday, but it was all (PUN ALERT) par for course. Life is beautiful.
Oh the Hu-manatee
This Thursday, the wife and I are off on a travel intensive 4 day safari of the Serengeti. A lot to see and do in a vast area in only a few days. One thing I’d love to see is the annual wildebeest migratory super-herd but I think about now the herd may have crossed the Mara river and is in Kenya, boo. At mke’s insistence (let the record state) we plan to splurge and- all going to plan- do a balloon ride over the plains. Expect photos of lions and a Hindenburg recreation soon.
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